When I Worry That God Doesn't See Me, I Remember This

“Auntie, why are you so good at finding me?”

It was an honest question from my four-year-old nephew.

We were on our umpteenth round of hide and seek, and Alder was baffled that I found him every time.

I couldn’t help laughing at that charming innocence that renders children unable to imagine a perspective other than their own—If I can’t see them, they can’t see me.

What he doesn’t know is that when we play hide and seek, I can almost always find him immediately. I stroll into the room and see his little foot protruding from under the coffee table or the crown of his silky head poking out from the back of the toy bin, like a toadstool sprouting behind fallen leaves—covered but not concealed.

To humor him, I pretend to search, wandering around saying, “Where could Adler be?”

Sometimes, as if worried I won’t find him, he offers clues. “I’m by the woodstove, Auntie!” or “I need to hide in the pantry again!”

But his question made me think, aren’t we the same way with God?

Sometimes, I feel that if I can’t hear or see God, then He must not hear or see me.

On my bleaker days, I fear He won’t show up. I feel hidden and alone and even wonder if I’ve been forgotten.  I’m not playing hide and seek, but the much more serious game of life, and there are moments I’m terrified that I won’t have what I need to succeed.

My heart murmurs, God, do you see what’s happening? Do you see my need? Where are you? Do you even know what’s going on?

And then, when He does come through, like my nephew, I’m honestly a little surprised. God, wow! How are you so good at finding (providing, comforting, guiding, healing, etc.) me?! Thank you! How do you do that?

Like a child, I forget that God has a MUCH BIGGER view of the world than I do. Yes, I should be awed when He meets me in my need, but perhaps I shouldn’t be so surprised. Of course He will! He has infinite resources and wisdom beyond comprehension.

He knows all, and He sees all. He has answers for everything and provision in abundance. Even when things look impossible or unbelievable.

The Psalmist expresses this powerfully when he declares:

"O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.
You go before me and follow me.” (Psalm 139: 1-5, NLT)

King David becomes increasingly exuberant as he goes on to proclaim that even if we wanted to hide from God, we couldn’t!

“I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence!” (v. 7).

High above the earth or deep in its molten core, at the pinnacle of Mount Everest or the icy edges of Antarctica, far across the widest ocean or in the burning deserts of the Sahara—there is no place to too far, deep, hot or cold for Him to reach.

Darkness won’t cover us like a cloak, and light can never blind Him to where we are. And not only does He know every detail of our today, He has seen us all along—He watched before we were born, and He sees every second laid out before us. Like a detailed screenplay, scene by scene, He knows it all.

This astounding reality is beyond my understanding. Childlike, I see only what’s around me, and I know only what I’ve experienced.

When I look at my surroundings, it’s like I’m looking through a pinhole. But like a wise and seasoned caregiver, God sees the big picture. Compared to my pinhole, His outlook is a vast panorama.

My little game with Alder and his innocent question reminds me to humbly consider my limited perspective. There is so much I don’t know—and that’s a good thing! I find peace knowing that He sees solutions that I can’t even imagine. And I take comfort that, no matter what, I am never out of his sight, and I am never forgotten. No hints needed.